Home Blog Clemens found on a pile of money
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Clemens found on a pile of money |
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Tuesday, 15 May 2007 |
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SluggerWily.com's advance scouts in Tampa, Florida have broken cover to announce that the aging Yankees pitcher has been found sitting on a pile of money (in $1, $5 and $10 denominations) in his private dressing room. "He was on the money," said Yankees minor leaguer James LaSala.
Coaches overhead Roger Clemens say he was "going to hit the mound" and assumed that he was going to be tossing some warm-up pitches. Well, turns out Roger Rocket was headed to his private dressing room for some "me-time"!!
After 30 minutes of looking around for Roger, the team spokesman broke down the dressing room door to find Rocket-Man indulging himself in the previously-unknown practice of "Dollar-Bill-Yoga" reciting mantras whilst perched on top of a Texas-sized mound of dollar bills. No official word on what he was saying to himself but an unnamed bystander claimed Roger was found wearing only socks which appeared to be faintly red. Last week, it was reported that Clemens had some oddly chosen words to say about his money: "I still have people that I don't want to let down: Cash and Mr. Steinbrenner." Strange words for a simple man, however, no one thought it would come to this. |
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